Trump Bans Words

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WASHINGTON – Dec 16, 2018, 1:21pm          President Trump has just banned the following words; psychotic, moron, dentures, Poligrip, combover, liar, Alabama, harassment, Mueller, FBI, CIA, collusion, Vlady, golden showers, Dear Leader (reinstated), Alec Baldwin, wiki-torches, tiki-leaks, Washington Post, Jeff Bezos, Jeff Sessions, that black girl I just fired again, CNN, CDC, covfefe, Palestinian, Pelosi, rape, Puerto Rico, paper towels, trillions, deficit, affordable, care, Nigeria, tweet-storm, hearings, investigate, investigating, investigation, impeachment

White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee-Sanders said when asked by reporters why the words had been banned, “Only an idiot would ask why these obvious words are being banned. I think most Americans are smart enough to know why without needing to be told by the press. And I think I have nothing further on that.  However, I will say that in order to demonstrate our level of commitment to diversity in the White House amidst recent lies and insinuations about us firing our only black person, which she was definitely NOT, we will be beginning Monday’s daily press briefing with a Navajo Code Talker, and not the one who just died, obviously, maybe the singing one, who will describe why these words must be banned.” Huckabee-Sanders added “And out of consideration to Native Americans we will do that in front of a portrait of Pocahontas, the real one this time, because we are fully aware of what ‘optics’ means and irrespective of what you in the media say, we do learn from our past mistakes.”  Huckabee-Sanders said the administration refused to rule out the banning of “future bad words”.


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